life quotes
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life quotes
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life quotes
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life quotes
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Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond with you at bat. Then fold second base down to home and set the baby on the pitcher's mound. Put first base and third together, bring up home plate and pin the three together. Of course, in case of rain, you gotta call the game and start all over again. ~Jimmy Piersal, on how to diaper a baby, 1968
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When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to do it. ~Mark Twain
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My father used to play with my brother and me in the yard. Mother would come out and say, "You're tearing up the grass." "We're not raising grass," Dad would reply. "We're raising boys." ~Harmon Killebrew
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Dad, your guiding hand on my shoulder will remain with me forever. ~Author Unknown
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Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children. ~George Bernard Shaw
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I still have a full deck; I just shuffle slower now. ~Author Unknown
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A father carries pictures where his money used to be. ~Author Unknown
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One father is more than a hundred Schoolemasters. ~George Herbert, Outlandish Proverbs, 1640
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I'm sixty years of age. That's 16 Celsius. ~George Carlin, Brain Droppings, 1997
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Are we not like two volumes of one book? ~Marceline Desbordes-Valmore
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Because time itself is like a spiral, something special happens on your birthday each year: The same energy that God invested in you at birth is present once again. ~Menachem Mendel Schneerson
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Dad, your guiding hand on my shoulder will remain with me forever. ~Author Unknown
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Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle. ~Bob Hope
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There's something like a line of gold thread running through a man's words when he talks to his daughter, and gradually over the years it gets to be long enough for you to pick up in your hands and weave into a cloth that feels like love itself. ~John Gregory Brown, Decorations in a Ruined Cemetery, 1994
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You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely. ~Ogden Nash
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Old as she was, she still missed her daddy sometimes. ~Gloria Naylor
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I'm sixty years of age. That's 16 Celsius. ~George Carlin, Brain Droppings, 1997
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It would seem that something which means poverty, disorder and violence every single day should be avoided entirely, but the desire to beget children is a natural urge. ~Phyllis Diller
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Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what happened. ~Jennifer Yane
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Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest. ~Larry Lorenzoni
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When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to do it. ~Mark Twain
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My father used to play with my brother and me in the yard. Mother would come out and say, "You're tearing up the grass." "We're not raising grass," Dad would reply. "We're raising boys." ~Harmon Killebrew
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When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to do it. ~Mark Twain
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Middle age is having a choice between two temptations and choosing the one that'll get you home earlier. ~Dan Bennett
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Sherman made the terrible discovery that men make about their fathers sooner or later... that the man before him was not an aging father but a boy, a boy much like himself, a boy who grew up and had a child of his own and, as best he could, out of a sense of duty and, perhaps love, adopted a role called Being a Father so that his child would have something mythical and infinitely important: a Protector, who would keep a lid on all the chaotic and catastrophic possibilities of life. ~Tom Wolfe, The Bonfire of the Vanities
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They say that age is all in your mind. The trick is keeping it from creeping down into your body. ~Author Unknown
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Youth is a disease from which we all recover. ~Dorothy Fulheim
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Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician. ~Author Unknown
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Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle. ~Bob Hope
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The first sign of maturity is the discovery that the volume knob also turns to the left. ~Jerry M. Wright
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A father is always making his baby into a little woman. And when she is a woman he turns her back again. ~Enid Bagnold
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Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle. ~Bob Hope
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Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act. ~Truman Capote
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They say that age is all in your mind. The trick is keeping it from creeping down into your body. ~Author Unknown
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Henry James once defined life as that predicament which precedes death, and certainly nobody owes you a debt of honor or gratitude for getting him into that predicament. But a child does owe his father a debt, if Dad, having gotten him into this peck of trouble, takes off his coat and buckles down to the job of showing his son how best to crash through it. ~Clarence Budington Kelland
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We advance in years somewhat in the manner of an invading army in a barren land; the age that we have reached, as the saying goes, we but hold with an outpost, and still keep open communications with the extreme rear and first beginnings of the march. ~Robert Louis Stevenson, "Virginibus Puerisque II," Virginibus Puerisque, 1881
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Sherman made the terrible discovery that men make about their fathers sooner or later... that the man before him was not an aging father but a boy, a boy much like himself, a boy who grew up and had a child of his own and, as best he could, out of a sense of duty and, perhaps love, adopted a role called Being a Father so that his child would have something mythical and infinitely important: a Protector, who would keep a lid on all the chaotic and catastrophic possibilities of life. ~Tom Wolfe, The Bonfire of the Vanities
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Are we not like two volumes of one book? ~Marceline Desbordes-Valmore
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A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age. ~Robert Frost
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Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. ~Elizabeth Stone
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When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to do it. ~Mark Twain
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Old as she was, she still missed her daddy sometimes. ~Gloria Naylor
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It kills you to see them grow up. But I guess it would kill you quicker if they didn't. ~Barbara Kingsolver, Animal Dreams
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One father is more than a hundred Schoolemasters. ~George Herbert, Outlandish Proverbs, 1640
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A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun. Enjoy the trip. ~Author Unknown
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Our birthdays are feathers in the broad wing of time. ~Jean Paul Richter
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They say that age is all in your mind. The trick is keeping it from creeping down into your body. ~Author Unknown
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Blessed indeed is the man who hears many gentle voices call him father! ~Lydia M. Child, Philothea: A Romance, 1836
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Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once. ~Dave Barry, "Your Disintegrating Body," Dave Barry Turns 40, 1990
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Middle age is the time when a man is always thinking that in a week or two he will feel as good as ever. ~Don Marquis
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